Monthly Archives: June 2013

Who Am I?

Hello!

This week kind of breezed by. I’m halfway through my internship at Windward. Man, that actually makes me sad already. I already know I’m going to be really sad when I have to leave. I may never see these people again. Or I may. But it will be a long time either way. And the way the day works is…pleasant. Wake up at 6, work out, get to work around 8:15, work until lunchtime, go out to lunch with everyone, come back and do more work, and silly interactions interspersed throughout the day. Often (like Tuesday game nights) there’s something fun in the evening, and if not something fun with the company I do something on my own and have a good time most days.

I really like it. I will be sad to see it out of my life. But for now I’ll make the most of it and enjoy it!

In the meantime, to the title.

Who am I?

The question has a simple enough answer. I’m Wendy Brooks. I’m 19 (20 in August!). Rising junior at Harvey Mudd College. CS major. Lived in Washington before college (but only since I was 8). There’s a fair amount of factual information. That’s easy enough.

But that’s not what I mean. For so long, I’ve identified as quiet, shy, introverted. I still kind of do. But then I look at how I interact with people now. I’m not quiet, per se. When it’s a group of people I don’t know I am, sure. But if it’s people I’m at all comfortable with I don’t seem to be. I’m not quiet at Windward, certainly. I’d call myself loud, in a sense. Vocal, perhaps, because volume I still lack. And I like talking to people a lot. Socializing is awesome. Especially with the people here, and the people at Mudd.

I guess it might be that I’m better at and prefer smaller, one-on-one (or three or four people) interactions to larger groups. Because I end up being quiet in a large group, or at least quieter. So I don’t feel like I’m introverted strictly speaking. Although I have become a bit better at that, talking more in that setting (as appropriate), but it’s still quite effortful compared to a one-on-one conversation. That’s not to say that large groups aren’t fun – I often enjoy them a lot. But one-on-one tends to me preferred mode of interaction, I guess.

So am I shy, or not? Am I quiet, or loud? Extrovert, or introvert? Or, much more likely, I’m somewhere in the middle?

There’s also the matter of nerdiness. I have always considered myself kind of nerdy/dorky, and at a bare minimum quirky (which I have no doubt is still true). But lately I’m not sure…and there is certainly (at least on the internet) a discussion about what makes people nerdy versus poser-y. So my thoughts on this in terms of me are a bit scattered and uncertain. I like things like Poke’mon (a lot) and I play some amount of videogames. In that category though, I don’t play the big games that most of my friends seem to play: Magic: the Gathering, or StarCraft, Half-Life, Mass Effect, there’s a whole slew of games that many of the people I spend time with are familiar with and talk about, and I’m just not really interested in them. I dunno. My lack there almost makes me feel like I’m not truly…nerdy or something. But that’s just how I’ve always identified too. I dunno. It’s weird.

It’s the kind of the thing that doesn’t really matter, but somehow I’m worried that it does. Especially if I end up somewhere in the CS field where the fact that I’m a women is an actual thing that comes up. I hesitate to say it’s a problem, but in some places it actually is. I’ve been fortunate, because it isn’t at Mudd or Windward at all, which is amazing and wonderful. But yeah. Like it really doesn’t matter but if it was as simple as acknowledging that and moving on life would be a whole lot easier.

Anyway. That’s enough self-reflection for now I suppose. It’s not something I’m constantly thinking about or that directly impacts my life. Mostly I don’t really think about it, I just behave as myself. Which is cool, because I used to really not even know what behaving like myself meant. But even though I’m unsure I do know how to be myself, as much as anyone else seems to know how to do the same.

But I want to categorize it, so I can put into words who I am. Humans are more complex than that, undoubtedly. So it’s a bit silly. Can’t help it though.

Anyway, I’ve got some plans for the weekend so that’s cool. It should be fun, despite being alone for a bit longer than I like.

Here’s hoping I don’t melt in the ridiculous heat,

Wendy

Back To The Grindstone

Except that work doesn’t really feel like a grindstone so much, usually. But it is time to get down to business.

To be honest with you, today was one of those days where I start to doubt my ability. I knew that I would be behind because I was gone for a week, but I felt like I was behind to start, and hearing about it today kind of freaked me out a little bit.

Mild context: four interns are working on the same project, four separate parts of it. So we should all finish around the same time is kind of the idea about it (although it sounds like the C# stuff has more to it that the Java people will help with, so that’s…good…I think).

This morning we had our dev meeting as per usual. In which I found out that two of the other interns think they’ll be done within the week. Auuuuu ;_; I’m really glad for them, but that stressed me out a bit because I’m not almost done as far as I can tell, and at the time I had some problems I had been trying to fix for a while (I did fix them today, as it turns out). Most of what I did today was fix inane problems. Which didn’t help me feel a lot better about that.

Like, in terms of straight up productivity, today was pretty reasonable, especially for a first day back. I solved a ton of problems and reasonably quickly and without assistance. However, they didn’t feel like progress because they seemed rather inane. Which is unbelievably irritating when you already feel behind. ;_;

Don’t get me wrong, I’m mostly fine. I’m not in like OHGOSH PANIC MODE ENGAGE ZOOOOOOOOM, but I do feel a bit worried and am going to need to find a way to boost my confidence because I’m sure I code better when I feel good about myself. I did accomplish and finish a thing by the end of the day, and it worked, but I had intended to be done with that the week before I left so that didn’t really help. Although I’m glad it worked. So if I just really get my butt in gear tomorrow I may be able to finish another one, which would make me feel a lot better. Wub. There’s a lot to do.

And yes yes I know I can do it I just feel a bit worried about it because being behind is one of those things for me. It’s kind of like how I get stressed out about being late or not finishing homework assignments in time despite having more than enough time. It’s just a personality quirk, which is good in a sense because it motivates me, but is also bad because it’s stressful.

All the pressure comes from myself, and not any other source, to make that crystal clear. Which is why this stress feels a bit silly but at least I understand it I guess? SHRUG.

However, to finish on a positive note, I am excited to be back in Boulder. Games night again tomorrow night, seeing a movie with friends Thursday night, maybe some more hiking this weekend, you know, there’s stuff going on. The first day tends to be hard but the rest of the week seems good. And I’m going to work out every morning this week starting tomorrow! HUZZAH. EXERCISE. Which also makes me feel good and happy with myself, so that.

I want to leave a picture of something here. Which reminds me that I want to take a picture of how I’ve decorated my space at work…pipe cleaners and plushies everywhere. : D

I can do this. Right? Right. (I should print the motivational kitten eel picture, minus the black background! : D)

~Wendy

Have a determined Portal-chu I drew back in May of 2011. :) MOTIVATING.

Have a determined Portal-chu I drew back in May of 2011. :) MOTIVATING.

EDIT: I saw the title as I was posting this (“Life is Golden”) and was reminded why I titled the blog that – partly because my typical choice of username is Golden3point14, but partially because I want to remind myself that my life really is golden, for the most part. And by that I mean it’s really good, and I shouldn’t let the little things get me down (or in this case the things I’m stressing myself about it that I should calm down about). Just wanted to share that.

Vacation-y Things PART 2

Alt title: The days in which I went hiking to some pretty waterfalls, finished a picture, and had a few feels.

Picture: the ki-nona-eel! It is a combination cat with 9 eel limbs. Don’t worry about it too much. It turned out a lot cuter than I expected. It makes me happy.

How can you not be motivated by those adorable eyes? And all that winking is just so motivating!

How can you not be motivated by those adorable eyes? And all that winking is just so motivating! Meow!

Yep I sure am strange.

A few days ago (keeping track of the days is hard on vacation) we went on a (relatively easy) hike out to some beautiful falls. You know it wasn’t that hard because my grandpa went with us. He’s quite spry for his age, but nonetheless the hike was not particularly challenging. It was quite pretty though, as illustrated below.

Trail head.

Trail head.

Pretty river shot. : ) Lots of nice views.

Pretty river shot. : ) Lots of nice views.

The finale! The falls themselves. Absolutely stunning. Also, that is a highway. This hike is between the two sides of the highway. It's nifty!

The finale! The falls themselves. Absolutely stunning. Also, that is a highway. This hike is between the two sides of the highway. It’s nifty!

OH MAN also my dad downloaded a hilarious voice for our Garmin navigation system. It was called “Doctor Nightmare”. My brother and I preferred to call it “Ghost Butler Chauffeur”. It would randomly say things if there hadn’t been anything for it to say, like laugh maniacally or that sort of thing. It was quite entertaining. XD It became the thing. Like on the hike we would occasionally pass abandoned houses, and it would be, “THAT’S WHERE THE GHOST BUTLER LIVES” and that sort of thing. It’s probably not as funny as I find it. XD

It is a little sad today because while I’m here cleaning the house for the grad party tomorrow (YAY!) the rest of the company is out at some sort of family fun center have a celebration. And I’m missing it. I was pretty upset when I found that out but I think I’m okay with it now. I mean there’s not a lot of point in being upset about it. Doesn’t change anything, so why expend the emotion if I can avoid it. I may try and organize something else and invite everyone and see what happens (if I can ever think of something else that would be fun to do…most things would be fun with everyone, but you need a starting point really). But yeah. There’s that.

Currently today I’ve decided which stuffed animals I will be keeping. I have two massive baskets full of stuffed animals (and more I think because I didn’t see some that I KNOW I have). I am donating more than will fit in a giant garbage bag. Ah man, the last time I went through and picked out animals to give away every decision to give one away tugged at my heart strings. But I was so much younger at any rate. This time it was kind of like, “man I remember when I pretended you were a vampire rabbit, that sure was fun”. And then I put my vampire rainbow rabbit in the bag. I am saving a few plushies. For example, all the Poke’mon ones, a cat, a ferret and an otter (they adopted each other as siblings, it’s a long story : D ), and maybe a few more in there. It just so much easier this time around. I never, ever thought it would be easy for me to just toss my animals into a giant bag when I was younger. I was so attached XD But I’m doing it and I hope the kids who get ’em have fun with them. It does feel a bit sentimental. When I come back in August I am supposed to go through all the things in my room and clean things up…that will be…something…XD I’m still quite sentimental about old drawing books and diaries (despite the fact that I don’t want to read the diaries anytime soon I want to keep them around, it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense buuuuut whatever).

And my dad is smoking some meat (ribs, brisket, pulled pork…maybe even some pig candy, which is essentially brown sugar delicious bacon that’s been smoked and is crispy and DELICIOUS) and that’s basically awesome. Meat being my favorite food group and all. (Which randomly reminds me, I have decided that what I want for my birthday is not a cake, but a STEAK. I will acquire one absolutely.)

So one more thing here. Met with some homefriends yesterday while I’m back in town. One of them asked us to say what our dream jobs were. With a shrug I gave my usual response, which is that I’d love to work for a company like Microsoft or Google. She looked at me and was like, “no, your dream job, not like what you think you’ll be doing”. Which kind of threw me off. Because working at one of those companies was actually my idea of a dream job for a while. It might still be, I dunno.

Another friend mentioned that the idea of a dream job was overrated. And I agree with that. The reasoning there is that, at least for me, it’s not so much about what I’m literally doing. It’s more about the people and that sort of thing. For example, I’m really happy at my internship with Windward. If I had gotten a job somewhere slightly less awesome, I would probably not be unhappy or thinking it wasn’t awesome, because I would never have had Windward to compare to. So really, as long as I end up somewhere I’m happy, the where and the what don’t matter as much to me.

It did get me thinking about why I like my internship so much, because right now I’m even to the point of missing it a bit while I’m away. While I do like the challenge of the actual job part, what I really like and what really makes it is the people and how the company operates. We have board game night, we have fun lunches, random conversations, and the office is general pleasant and pretty chill. And, despite my not being able to attend, there are fun celebrations like the one happening today. What I want is a job with this, or similar to this, type of environment. People are taken care of, people are happy, and people like each other. It’s pretty great.

Anyway, rambling thoughts aside, I have to be an adult and deal with adult business like possibly incorrect bills. HOORAY ADULTHOOD. (I guess I’m not technically an adult…wub…I’m like a month short…)

~Wendy

Two months.

This is a deep, serious entry. It contains thoughts that are very important to me. Fair warning.

This hasn’t come up in this blog yet. Before I moved to Windward’s site I wrote a very deep, serious entry about it. (Be warned, it is quite heavy, but for the curious, http://golden3point14.blogspot.com/2013/04/passing.html)

So, tomorrow is two months.

Two months since my grandmother passed away.

That doesn’t feel like a long time. I feel…cold, when I think about it. That’s really a poor description, but I don’t know how else to say it. Like even with everything, even with the funeral, it doesn’t feel…it’s still kind of hard to believe. Thank goodness I’ve stopped thinking about it randomly throughout the day, for the most part.

But sometimes I do think about it. And I’m still sad. Sometimes I just have to stop and think about it and then move on. As a small example, I think she’d really like the silly drawings I’ve been doing lately. I think she’d find them very cute and funny. She always liked my drawings, even when they were terrible.

To be honest, and this is kind of scary to admit, I was scared to come home this week. For a few reasons. The last time I saw my family was at the funeral. But mainly, my grandpa was also visiting us. He still is, this week, actually. I was scared, because to me, they were always together. We even had a nickname for both of them, as a unit: Gumpa. Apparently this was from me as a small child. But to see him, and not to see her, scared me a lot more than I care to admit.

And it’s been fine. But it does feel a bit like something is missing.

Something I did was bring the stuffed rabbit I have with me. I always keep it on my bed, but I usually don’t bring her home with me. My grandma went by Bunny. When we Skyped if I had Rabbit with me or when I visited she would love to talk to Rabbit and be silly and that sort of thing. So I brought Rabbit with me this time, because…it felt like the thing to do. Because she wasn’t there, but if she had been, that would have been the thing.

Erp, tears welling up. Hang on a second…I guess I just haven’t expressed myself about this in a while.

I miss her. And really that will be true for a long time. And that is reasonable, I think.

She would have been really excited to hear about what I’m doing.

Yesterday at lunch my grandpa was asking us how to delete contacts out of his phone. He was deleting her. I hadn’t done that yet. I had thought about it and decided I didn’t want to just yet. I hadn’t thought about it in a while though. It was jarring. And so I went into my contacts and deleted it. And then wished I hadn’t. But I did. And why should I have kept it…but I somehow wish I had, a bit. It makes it feel all the more final. Which, it is. I just…it caught me off guard that it came up and that I did that. I dunno.

On the other hand, I guess I do kind of think about her. I have a lot of her jewelry, and her bandanas and scarves. And I wear them. Quite regularly. The last month or so of school I wore the same necklace everyday. And then when my dad came down to drive to Boulder with me he brought scarves and jewelry for me to have. And I wear them, and it makes me happy to wear them, because they belonged to her. It makes me feel connected. It makes me feel like she is proud of me. And no one around me has any idea. But it’s so special to me, that I have these things, and that I can wear them.

It’s still pretty tough. And on nights like tonight, when I stop and think about it and realize just how long it hasn’t been, it’s even harder. I want to cry. And I probably will, later.

I just…I still have a lot of feelings about this. Of course I do, I don’t think anyone expects otherwise. I just didn’t realize quite how many until just now. I could go on and on. But, for right now, I shouldn’t.

This feels a bit out of place on this blog. Given how I haven’t talked seriously about anything here yet. But I…just had to…I feel relieved to have typed any of it…but still that I could go on forever and never feel that I’ve finished.

At any rate. I should sleep now.

Thank you for listening.

~Wendy

Vacation-y Things Part 1

I actually just don’t have a title for this.

Alt title: MORE PHOTO DUMPING. I HOPE YOU LIKE PHOTOS BECAUSE PHOTOS.

So as I mentioned Saturday, brother graduated. Pretty proud of him. He had a sizable paragraph of achievements in the little graduation booklet thingy. I’m so very, very excited to see where he goes with his life (which at current is RPI but I do mean a more abstract sense as you might suspect…). At any rate we got some pretty cool pictures out of it so WHABAM pictures. We sure do have faces.

Look! Me and a graduate. We're happy siblings. : D

Look! Me and a graduate. We’re happy siblings. : D

My dad and my brother make the best faces so I thought I would share them.

My dad and my brother make the best faces so I thought I would share them.

ERHMAHGERD GUYZ SELF PIC. ...I actually think this looks kind of cool though, to be honest.

ERHMAHGERD GUYZ SELF PIC.
…I actually think this looks kind of cool though, to be honest.

This is typical Brooks behavior and it is kind of my favorite picture ever right now. Yeah siblings~

This is typical Brooks behavior and it is kind of my favorite picture ever right now. Yeah siblings and matching eyebrows!

Family. : )

Family. : )

And that was Saturday. Like I said, super proud of my brother (his name is Aaron, on a side note). He is a cool kid. : D Even with all the snark I am obliged to give him as his older sister.

Sunday and Monday have been pretty cool thus far as well – Grandpa (as seen in the closest photo above) is visiting from Florida this week, so we’re doing some of the more touristy things we wouldn’t do on a regular day. We’re “vacationing from home” is the phrase my dad used to describe it. And so far the weather has held up – not so hot I’m on fire, but warm enough that shorts are an option (although having a jacket around is a pretty good idea too).

And here are pictures regarding the happenings this week~

Crystal Mountain is a somewhat overpriced ski resort, but they have this new gondola and the view up top is fantastic, so tourist-y-thing-I-wouldn't-normally-do AWAY! : )

Crystal Mountain is a somewhat overpriced ski resort, but they have this new gondola and the view up top is fantastic, so tourist-y-thing-I-wouldn’t-normally-do AWAY! : )

It was also the last day of skiing at Crystal so people were dressed up in costumes. I have no idea who those people are, but I sure do have a photo.

It was also the last day of skiing at Crystal so people were dressed up in costumes. I have no idea who those people are, but I sure do have a photo.

Mt. Rainier view from the top. Almost completely clear, but not quite. Still stunning.

Mt. Rainier view from the top. Almost completely clear, but not quite. Still stunning.

Dat chipmunk. Living life on the edge. As chipmunks do. It seemed cool. Also I'm a chipmunk (or so I've been told) so there's that.

Dat chipmunk. Living life on the edge. As chipmunks do. It seemed cool. Also I’m a chipmunk (or so I’ve been told) so there’s that.

So more views! There were chairs set up. It was so calming and picturesque (and even cold, which was awesome).

So more views! There were chairs set up. It was so calming and picturesque (and even cold, which was awesome).

Fair warning that I have this habit of going to museums and taking absurd amounts of pictures. Now, I have the common sense not to post most of them, and I even did a stunning job of holding back this time, but there might still end up being a lot of them because cars sure do look like they have funny faces. And stuff. So there’s that. This is in some way an apology. So there will be relevant things after the pictures if you find yourself no longer caring. XD

Also this is the LeMays American Car Museum in Tacoma, WA. I actually don’t know/care much about cars, but I can appreciate how old and cool these ones were. But I also took weird pictures to amuse myself so it’s not terribly representative of the museum as a heads up XD

 

I find these older looking cars snazzy. I took too many photos of them. I would drive one. :0

I find these older looking cars snazzy. I took too many photos of them. I would drive one. :0

This car. I can't. Better picture of it below.

This car. I can’t. Better picture of it below.

PSHOOOO I am a rocket not a car what no TOTALLY A ROCKET.

PSHOOOO I am a rocket not a car what no TOTALLY A ROCKET.

I am impressed (but not surprised) that someone made this a car.

I am impressed (but not surprised) that someone made this a car.

Look how tiny that car is it's like for small wealthy children. I think that is actually what it was for, in all seriousness. VROOOM.

Look how tiny that car is it’s like for small wealthy children. I think that is actually what it was for, in all seriousness. VROOOM.

It looks angry so I pretended to be it. That is how people museum right? Right.

It looks angry so I pretended to be it. That is how people museum right? Right.

Other angle of angry car because I liked it a lot. XD

Other angle of angry car because I liked it a lot. XD

Old car tires apparently say, "NO SKID" on them. If they are no skid. It's just funny. XD

Old car tires apparently say, “NO SKID” on them. If they are no skid. It’s just funny. XD

We were down by the Tacoma waterfront so we sat and watched some people go on a sketchy parasail journey. Smelled like ocean. : )

We were down by the Tacoma waterfront so we sat and watched some people go on a sketchy parasail journey. Smelled like ocean. : )

So there’s that! By relevant things after the photos what I definitely mean is rambling and also…the unveiling of a WORK IN PROGRESS of an art piece I am crafting. (Yes, use fancy words to build suspense)

Future things this week? Well, going into Seattle, boatloads of appointments (hair, orthopedic, dentist?), graduation party Saturday, hopefully a small hike, and…I got distracted. I don’t remember what the thing I was saving for last was…OH YEAH maybe even seeing friends who are here (both high school and college friends, which is snazzy).

And before I drag this out any longer (apparently my amount of blogging is awesome though, so I have just been informed), I WILL PRESENT TO YOU, THE KI-NONA-EEL

Actually, first, I promise next time to try and have more deep thoughts. This entry is hilariously…uh…I don’t even it just doesn’t have a ton of deep thoughts. I dunno. I like deep thoughts. Right now I am feeling a bit insane and weird though so you get that.

RIGHT. WIP OF KI-NONA-EEL.

It's a kitten with 9 eel appendages. ...I blame En-jay for this. At any rate, colors are quite subject to change. Kitten eel. : D

It’s a kitten with 9 eel appendages.
…I blame En-jay for this.
At any rate, colors are quite subject to change.
Kitten eel. : D

Lastly, as I mentioned previously, comments are always loved and appreciated. : ) Well, I shouldn’t say always, or someone will inevitably try to prove me wrong…

AND NOW TO PLAY KIRBY AIR RIDE WITH THE BROTHER.

Bai for nao~

Wendy

And home. (Alt title: definitely didn’t do work nope nope never)

And then I was home.

And then I was working at home, as I was explicitly told not to do. Whoops! I’m just still thoroughly amazed and awed by the fact that I can remote in to my work desktop and do things with it. Also the work I was doing is not the main thing I should be working on, and mostly repetitive simple work, and is easier on my personal computer anyway, so I see no problems with this. Everyone is getting ready for the day and I’m ready right now, so why not. It makes me feel happy to accomplish things like that at any rate.

If you don’t want to ready my semi-technical CS babble, skip to below the picture for FEEEEELINGS.

This past week I actually feel I’ve accomplished things, for a lot of reasons which is pretty cool.

  • At a company meeting, the product Sarah and I worked on (and the one I worked on this morning) was specifically cited as awesome and useful. People clapped for us. It was awesome to see literal evidence of our success and contribution to the company.
  • Finally figured out how to even start data sources (which I had never done before in my life) and have solved a lot of issues as they came up. I am so close to being able to accomplish a basic out tag (I’m not explaining this right now, sorry XD), and have almost all the query functionality down. Yay me. Solving problems.
  • Learned about reflection. Not like, oh hey, a mirror, I see my reflection, but the kind that involves a lot of metadata and feels a bit silly. It involves object of type Type. The type Type is not in fact the type (i.e. a class) but metadata about this type (so information about methods, data members, etc.) which you then call more functions on to extract/invoke information from. Neat. And basically necessary because of the way Salesforce sets up its data. If you haven’t heard of Salesforce, well, I don’t know much about it except that their data querying system is making my life a bit more difficult than it needs to be. But I think it’s almost completely worked out, and at least at a basic level.

So in terms of figuring things out, initially the sample code Salesforce provided me would just quit, and I couldn’t figure out why. The error that Visual Studios showed me was unhelpful. And then I noticed that the code was flashing an error message up for about two seconds before it disappeared. And I just kind of stared at it for a bit. And then decided the only way to fix this was to try and print screen it so I could read it. This is a lot more difficult than it seems. (I didn’t understand the code well enough to get it to stay. I think once it hit an exception it was quitting which seems kind of reasonable but…seriously…why wouldn’t you make sure your sample code showed errors for more than two seconds…)

 

This was the best I could do. Oh hey look sample Salesforce code. WHY. I COULD HAVE FIXED THIS SO MUCH FASTER IF I COULD HAVE READ IT. ;_;

This was the best I could do. Oh hey look sample Salesforce code. WHY. I COULD HAVE FIXED THIS SO MUCH FASTER IF I COULD HAVE READ IT. ;_;

So it turns out the problem was that Salesforce asks you for username and password, and my password it means password + security key. Really simple. Really easy fix. Too bad the disappearance of the window with the error message made this a lot more complicated than it needed to be…but then I fixed it and moved on with my life. Hooray!

I’m done working for today, most likely. My brother graduates in a few hours, my grandpa is here visiting, and tomorrow we’re probably going hiking at Crystal Mountain (oooh, going to ride the new gondola which I’ve never ridden).

I have a lot of feelings about my brother graduating. Mostly, I’m excited for him! I want to see who he’ll be once he’s been away at college and really given the chance to grow. I’m sure he’ll be absolutely awesome. He’ll also still be my little brother, so it’s weird that he’s graduating, but on the other hand I’m proud of him. He’s got cords and awards (YEAH BAND MARINE AWARD THING) and is an awesome kid.

Here he is a year ago visiting me over the summer. Dat face. :D He's probably got even taller since then...

Here he is a year ago visiting me over the summer. Dat face. : D He’s probably got even taller since then…

Anyway, catch ya later. : )

~Wendy

Getting Down To Business

Things to discuss before I forget:

  • Microsoft read only file sadness
  • Random honking guy I am going to blog about because he was mean D:
  • MUG making
  • PURPLE FEDORA
  • HIKING
  • AUGH I’M LEAVING FRIDAY

And now I will do these things out of order. HOORAY. Maybe I will even delete this list. Eh who am I kidding, I’m leaving it here. I always do that. I won’t edit this. NOPE NOPE NOPE.

So anyway. Things that happened. Yesterday was a cool day in which I hiked! I also went to a paint-your-own-pottery type place and painted a mug, which I will have pictures of soon. And bought a purple fedora, which I do not have pictures of. YET. It will happen eventually. Purple. Still have trouble quite believing that. XD

More tiltshift because why not. It looks kinda cool. And everything is so very vibrant!

More tiltshift because why not. It looks kinda cool. And everything is so very vibrant!

This is called the quarry, and it had the best rock chairs. Sarah is the rock queen in her rock throne. :0

This is called the quarry, and it had the best rock chairs. Sarah is the rock queen in her rock throne. :0

Tomas, one of my colleagues from Windward framing the excellent view we had. :D

Tomas, one of my colleagues from Windward framing the excellent view we had. :D

YEAH. Sassy in my rock throne.

YEAH. Sassy in my rock throne.

More pretty nature :D

More pretty nature :D

So before I launch into other things, man. Today at work we started our real project – data sources. It felt immediately overwhelming, and I was feeling like I didn’t even know how to start. For several hours. I was filled with doubt and suddenly scared. However, finally in the afternoon (with a bit of guidance) I found a direction. And then I found MORE UNRELATED INANE PROBLEMS. Well, some of them were less inane. Trying to follow instructions that use vocabulary you don’t understand, for instance, is not inane, but a legitimate problem. More inane was more computer restarting without asking. And also A BUG WITH MICROSOFT AAAAH D: I feel so betrayed.

So it turns out that in Windows XP and beyond, there’s this bug that Microsoft refuses to acknowledge in which folders have their attributes marked as unread (under properties for a particular folder the read-only box is filled with a blue square). The bug is that this can’t be undone. You change it and then when you go to view it, VOILA! It’s back. The attribute read-only status doesn’t really do much generally (except slow down the loading of folders if there’s a lot of read-only ones), but in this case it was straight up preventing me from doing what I needed to, and all the hacked together quick fixes (which have a low chance of working) failed me. Ach! With some guidance I got around it after an hour or two or three of googling and trying things and tearing my hair out. But I got it, which meant I could connect to my data source and tomorrow I can try and do real things. Thank goodness. Nyuuuuu. It was a bit stressful, but there was also a lot of silliness that went on that afternoon to counter-act it, so it’s okay. The morning was stressful though. TT_TT

Eh not actually going to write about random angry honking guy. Well, in short, he was mad because I STOPPED AT A RED LIGHT before making my right turn. Um…I legally have to stop, regardless of the fact that I have room to go. Calm down. Seriously. Then he passed me and voila, I ended up right behind him until I turned off the road. It didn’t get him anywhere to honk at me and rush around me fast as he could. We got to the places at the same time. Some people are quite silly that way.

And lastly for tonight, Friday I go home for a little over a week. Wow. Back to Washington. To see my brother graduate! And to see my Grandpa! And everyone. I may actually have written almost exactly this in my last entry. It simultaneously feels like I’ve been at Windward for only a short time, but also that I’ve been there a while. It’s flown by so far, but I also just feel so comfortable with the people. It’s odd, but good. I think I’ll miss them while I’m away. But not enough to detract away from seeing my family. :)

And apparently Kingdom Hearts 3 was just announced. I wish I had the appropriate console a lot right now XD Maybe one of these days.

And lastly, THIS.

I expected this to be a pun, but...it isn't...o_o

I expected this to be a pun, but…it isn’t…o_o

I don’t know what to make of a thing called “egg strategy”. I keep expecting the clever to suddenly jump out at me but it won’t…what the heck would an egg strategy even be…if you have a clever for it do share…or even a non-clever would work 😀

Anyway, to another day and waking up early for exercise!

~Wendy

 

Photo Dump

This is the part where I realize I haven’t uploaded the photos from my last hike, yet I’m going hiking tomorrow and intend to take photos there too. Huh.

So here’s some photos, from Chitauqua Park, about 10 minutes from my apartment. And also apartment apparently (good typo right there) not normally this green this time of year, but hey, I like green. 😀

First hike in Colorado, with the wonderful Schefflers. Pretty short hike but sure was beautiful!

First hike in Colorado, with the wonderful Schefflers. Pretty short hike but sure was beautiful!

Bonding with mountains :D

Bonding with mountains :D

Everything was just so beautiful it took all I had not to upload every photo I took.

Everything was just so beautiful it took all I had not to upload every photo I took.

We started down this trail and ended up turning around because we saw a BEAR. A baby bear. Woah!

We started down this trail and ended up turning around because we saw a BEAR. A baby bear. Woah!

Rocks :D

Rocks :D

Tiltshift function on my camera for funsies. It looks kinda cool. I would love one of those houses nestled down there.

Tiltshift function on my camera for funsies. It looks kinda cool. I would love one of those houses nestled down there.

These mountains are the flatirons. Because they look like flatirons. Straight up, that's the origin of the name.

These mountains are the flatirons. Because they look like flatirons. Straight up, that’s the origin of the name.

So pretty. :D

So pretty. :D

Hiking was pretty fun, and as I said, tomorrow is MORE HIKING! : ) I love that this is happening.

And here’s some more photos:

We went to Celestial Seasonings because they do a free tour and give you free tea so why not :D YEAH WE GOT TEA WOOOO.

We went to Celestial Seasonings because they do a free tour and give you free tea so why not 😀 YEAH WE GOT TEA WOOOO.

Yeah we so sassy in our hairnets. Hairnets are weird. XD Celestial Seasonings tour, as it turns out.

Yeah we so sassy in our hairnets. Hairnets are weird. XD Celestial Seasonings tour, as it turns out.

This was last week for the Windward scavenger hunt. This is the Windward intern team. : ) We're a pretty awesome group and I can't wait to get to know them better!

This was last week for the Windward scavenger hunt. This is the Windward intern team. : ) We’re a pretty awesome group and I can’t wait to get to know them better!

So yeah, there’s that. : ) Things are fun.

Today was also fun because we had our second real session of Eclipse Phase (think Dungeons and Dragons but with SCI-FI), and it was absolutely excellent. So many silly comments and it was just great fun. I enjoyed it quite a lot.

And this upcoming Friday I’m actually flying home…WOAH. I get to see my brother graduate! I get to see my Grandpa! It’ll be tons of fun, albeit weird to not be going to work especially since I fixed up my sleep schedule that way and all. Ah well, waking up at 7 am will let me work out, and Grandpa wakes up early anyway, if I recall.

Oh also I worked out today and now my arms hate me. Seems good. XD

And lastly, have a drawing of a spherical cow. The cow has horns because it’s drugged. Which is also why it looks so happy despite it’s position above a thing. Don’t worry about it. I just felt I should put this here.

You can't explain this, man. I like drawing spherical cows though :D

You can’t explain this, man. I like drawing spherical cows though :D

And since you’ve gotten this far, I’m going to be that person who asks you to comment if you have the chance. : D I can’t see stats or pageviews from this website so it wierds me out how I can’t tell if people are reading this. XD

Anyway, looking forward to tomorrow!

~Wendy

Empowerment Day, in theory

Today certainly had all the makings of an empowering day, at any rate. It has great possibility. We’ll see as I go through and write up about it if I feel that it’s more or less true. Before I dive into the Women in Tech conference that ate up my day today, I will talk about something that was definitely empowering.

We carpooled with members of Windward’s marketing team to the event (which was in Denver), and all left from Flatirons Mall. So of course when we got back we’re dropped off at a huge mall. HM! It turns out I was itching to shop a bit. Which is odd for me. More on that later. Point being, it ended up that if I was shopping, I was shopping alone. So since my main goal was shoes I thought I’d just do that and then beeline home. And then I noticed a sale at a store, and the cogs turned, and I realized, “HEY! Why can’t you go shopping by yourself? Why would that be so bad, huh?” As a result I went shopping for at least 1-1.5 hours. By myself. Made decisions. Bought things. Won’t bore you with the details. It isn’t the specific action that really matters at any rate. What really matters here was me once again realizing WOAH I CAN DO THINGS BY MYSELF AND IT ISN’T AWFUL. I have such an aversion to doing things on my own. I like to bring people with me. But it turns out it’s really not a bad thing at all. And every time I do something like that I end up feeling happy.

And now because I’m feeling so motivated and the apartment will be lonely this weekend, I’m going to go try out a gym, also by myself. Because I feel like I’m going to die being so pent up. >_> Argh. And also exercise is fun and helps me sleep and…yeah. It’ll be good. EXERCISE. (Maybe exercising the night before a hike is a dumb idea…wat no that’s a silly thought…PAIN IS GOOD.)

That thing I said earlier about how I normally don’t like shopping. Coming back to that. I don’t know who I am anymore, I’m pretty sure. I used to hate shopping. Now I like shopping, I like wearing dresses, I like coordinating my outfits SO HARD, painting my nails…when did this happen. I was so geeky and gave zero cares about this in high school. I mean, I’m still pretty geeky/dorky/whatever you wanna call it, but I’ve also got a methodology for accessorizing and that sort of thing. It’s…weird. @_@ I also have this problem with my personality lately. I have always identified as quiet and extremely introverted, and over the course of last semester I suddenly realized I’m not nearly as quiet as I used to be, and think of myself, at any rate. This is both freeing and terrifying. Freeing because, woah, I’m not quiet, I can like…talk to people and stuff. But terrifying because I feel like I don’t quite know who I am…and that’s…really weird…and do I need to know who I am? I think yes. But letting go of the quiet tag is like letting go of a part of myself…or it feels that way right now…it’s very odd…

And I’m going to break the serious mood now. I got a lot of swag from the Women in Technology conference. Where a lot is less than from the career fair at Mudd, but still. I don’t know why I said a lot, actually. I got swag. Overall impressions: the speakers were pretty cool. The event was very cool on principle. My only complaint is that women in tech seemed to mostly mean not programmers/software developers, which left me feeling rather out of place with all the business-y and market-y lingo floating around and being rather bad at networking as a result. Which was unfortunate.

At some point I will discuss the speakers and what they said in more detail, or at least the parts that struck me. That will be a long discussion though, and I decided to watch part of the Hunger Games and paint my nails instead, and there are often times I want to blog but don’t have much to say, so I can put them in there. Turns out I’m a sucker for introspection so I’ll appreciate having those…prompts, if you will, later.

This is the part where I continue to not have pictures. Face palm. Maybe from the hike Sunday. Wub wub.

On a side note, I tend to have way too much free time on the weekends, so people should hit me up for chats or whatnot. I miss people I’m not seeing on a semi-regular basis D:

Oh yeah, so the empowering day bit. I think most of my thoughts about that was just because of my own doing, not so much the conference, although that was useful and thought provoking for other reasons, as I’ll explain in a later entry.

Bye for now. : )

Nerf. Guns.

So this week has been a bit of a roller coaster, to be frank, but I think it’s going to end on the right foot. As in the correct foot. ALL OF THE FEET.

As I am writing this, it is currently Thursday. Thus I will use the present tense. Today, a NERF GUN BATTLE suddenly broke out in the office. People leaping in out of offices, running down the hallways firing, rage at the jamming of the Maverick, cries of alarm at being shot. I didn’t start out with a gun, but I quickly acquired one. I believe I was only hit once (and mind you, it hit my hair), but I nailed at least two or three people. It was wonderful and lasted for a good amount of time, actually.   These Nerf guns are supplied by Dave in fact, which makes them even better. Did I say how much I love the office, because DANG I LOVE THE WINDWARD OFFICE. : D So much fun. Especially since today I just worked straight for most of it. So good!

I’m also excited because I decided I wanted to e-mail and see if anyone wanted to go hiking with me, and two people (who aren’t Sarah, because I already knew Sarah wanted to come : D) said they would join us, which is excellent. I organized a thing and people said they are coming! I find this very exciting. I don’t know if I will have updated the blog before that happens so this paragraph may seem silly a bit later down XD I think I might.

Tomorrow I am attending a women in tech conference with a portion of the Windward team. That should be interesting. I have never done such a thing. I will have thoughts and feelings about it. I know that I tend to be critical about this sort of subject for some reason, but I hope it gets me introspecting and thinking as I am wont to do. It should be interesting at any rate, as I said.

I think I will post this tonight, so all of this silliness about tenses and days is unnecessary. AH WELL. What can you do…well, I could fix it, but no. I won’t.

Ah, today was also cool because having friends at the apartment to cook and watch Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni. This is very fun and I am glad it happens, and I think when we finish this anime I will probably be more than happy to watch another. It’s nice and helps me feel at home here. : )

But anyway, things are pretty good! I’m ready for more Nerf gun wars and hiking and all sorts of crazy antics. : D And also working on things I suppose…the atmosphere is just so good at the office, man. We do cool things. I like it. Third week in and I still like it nonetheless. Yeah. : D

(Also I plan to include more photos in the future…whoops)